Thursday, April 29, 2010

Thursday evening and Friday


PREFACE
When Amber announced that our beloved Chan was “gone,” several of us, along with Chan’s family, discussed what would happen to her BatB things that meant so much to her. So, as things came together, it was decided that JoAnn and I would go to Oscoda to help Chan’s family with the task of gathering and preserving the things that meant so much to her.
I'm just glad we got to do this for Chan, for her family, and for fandom, but it was a very hard and very sad task and I feel so honored to have been involved.
The folks in Oscoda were lovely and warm to us - from the family to Chan's friends. The folks at the bookstore sent boxes and packing materials. Sharon, who helped organize the memorial service, went above and beyond - scoring boxes for us, bringing tape over when we ran out, helping Amber pack, etc.
THURSDAY
We arrived on Thursday evening and after dropping our suitcases at the little cabin on the lake, we met Chan’s good friend, Sharon, at a local restaurant. She met us outside and we exchanged hugs. When we went inside she had the table set with candles and placemats from Chan's memorial, so we all cried right from the start. We talked about Chan and the memorial service and about how it was still so unreal. She said the flowers we all sent were beautiful - loads of red and white roses (we all think alike!). From the beginning Sharon has been a great resource, and through the process became a good friend. We meant to get a picture of the three of us, but somehow didn't, that night anyway. 


Boathouse Cabin


Beach
We spent a couple of hours eating, talking and crying and then we went back to the cabin for some sleep. The wind was blowing so hard and it was so cold outside, but warm inside. So, I made a video of our cozy little cabin. We loved the little fireplace and had it lit anytime we were in the cabin. If you listen you can hear the wind howling outside and one of the chairs on the deck blowing over.
Here’s the link to the vid:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v_XZp1z8tC4

FRIDAY



Chan’s house
It was still really cold. This morning the picnic table in front of our cabin on the lake was frosted over and also the car windows.
After defrosting the car windows we made our way to Chan’s house where we met Amber and Baci. Amy wasn’t there as she had to go back to work, so we didn’t get to meet her. Hurman had gone out for a little while.
Baci is just a lovable, active fur baby. He wanted us to go out back and throw the ball all the time. Then he discovered the big rolls of tape we were using. His mission was to grab one and make it out the back door with it. What he intended to do with it, I’m not sure. Maybe he planned to make us chase him outside and then get us to throw the ball, but he never made it out the door. One of us always caught him, but he kept trying. He is a bouncy, rambunctious but sweet-natured big puppy. He kept us on our toes. Amber said he slept really well that night as all the excitement wore him out.


Would somebody please play ball with me?


Trying to pose with Baci

Sharon and Deb

Amber is just precious. She knew her mom so well and helped us decipher between original artwork and prints. She also knew her mom would tuck things away in just about anything and helped us to find little things tucked away. We spent our day with her sharing stories and digging through "stuff," packing boxes, and tossing the ball with Baci during breaks.

Deb and Amber

Hurman is a big teddy bear of a man. He's very tall and very sweet and is so lost without Chan. It is so sad and so wrong for such a sweet family to be going through this. Of course at several times during the day one, two or all of us were crying at some time or other.
Sharon had gathered some boxes of various sizes and bubble wrap for us, and the folks from the book store in town also brought boxes over for us to use. We spent the day mostly upstairs, going through every shelf, drawer, box, under bed storage container, file folder, etc. in several rooms, packing 26 boxes with art, zines and other memorabilia. We were up and down the stairs so many times, our knees were creaking and our backs were aching, LOL. After we packed, we hauled to the car all the boxes from the day, and the bookstore was good enough to arrange to UPS them to JoAnn. The bookstore was selling some items designed by Chan and her daughter Amber - tote bags, tee shirts and other memorabilia - all to raise funds for the town, and it was a thrill to be able to buy things that they had designed.

Sharon and JoAnn

Everyone in town was so nice and so willing to help in any way they could. You could tell they all loved Chan so much. They were incredibly nice to us and accepted us as family.
That night Hurman took us out to dinner. He shared stories of his early life with Chan and things they did during their life together. One cute thing he said was that Chan was so beautiful, his teeth ached! He's such a dear, big bear of a man. and he opened up quite a bit, tearing up sometimes - we all kept having teary moments throughout the day and that evening. He's just devastated, and talked about having to pretend he's OK, but every morning when he wakes up and realizes Chan is gone, he gets emotional. He's trying his best to get on with life, but it's tough.


Amber and Hurman


This was hanging in the lobby of one of the restaurants we went to. It is one on Chan’s Paul Bunyan’s


To be continued….

9 comments:

  1. Thank you for this. It is nice to SEE Sharon and put a face to the friend I have found on Facebook. and to see that lovable furbaby as well as Amber and Hurman. I am so glad the two of you were able to assist Amber and hurman in what must have been a painful task.

    Cyndi

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  2. I did not know Chan but throughout this entire time you have made her come alive. I have gone from admiring the work of a very talented artist to admiring the woman behind the artist. Thank you both Deb and JoAnn.

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  3. It is just so beautiful what you both are doing for the family. It is a blessing to see such "earth angels" on a love mission. Tamara

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  4. Bless you both for taking on an awesome task. Chan had just moved the stock from her store and she told me she had mountains of stuff around and unsorted. I know you have your hands full. Be on the lookout for her miniatures, one of her big loves. She loved doll houses and making tiny things although she never said where she kept them. She was working on a diorama for the museum and she has murals around town, one of which is on the wall outside the building where her store was. There are town posters she painted but don't bear her name. She has statues in her garden, a bird bath, I think. Like her family I think I'm feeling sort of lost and teary. I keep wanting to call her. Deb, JoAnn you are my heroes. Thank you so very much. Aurea

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  5. Thanks for all the nice posts. Aurea, we didn't find any completed minatures. There were a couple of boxes like she used with the start of a tunnel, but we didn't take it. I'm sure if any of the family finds anything we missed, they will contact JoAnn.

    Even thought we cried a lot in Oscoda, I am still feeling lost and keep expecting to wake up and find this is all a dream.

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  6. I imagine it was very, very difficult, but perhaps it will help both you and Joann deal with Sandy's untimely death in the long run.
    I still don't quite believe it. She had so much presence it's hard to imagine her not being there.
    It was a lovely thing the two of you did, an unexpected expense to squeeze into your budgets. But I suspect it must have made things easier for her family.
    We all owe you our thanks.

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  7. I only knew Chan for a couple of years but was amazed by her willingness to accept anyone as family and make us all feel how much she loved us. You guys have done a wonderful job of showing the rest of the world the Chan we all loved so much

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